First of all. Now that I'm out. Can I just say, I was thirsty and I didn't even realize. Some crushes that I had are still approved by current 2015 me, because tbh, pretty hot, still would. But some of the crushes that I had. WHY. I mean, sure, they're fugly but maybe I liked their personality? What's there to like about their personality?? They were all absolute shit. Why.
Aside from crushes I wish I never liked, I also came across pictures of my depression and social awkwardness and solitude. Oh look, what a nice picture of my friends and seniors all hanging out with each other! That's nice, I used to hang out with them and was initially part of that clique! Where was I? Oh yeah, trying to hide behind walls or other friends because I was pathetic, depressed, alone and suicidal. I was so mentally ill. I don't cringe at this memory, though. My heart... Sinks. Why didn't these people help me at all? They didn't give a shit about me. Little to no one asked about me- all I got was weird/derogatory stares. So, fuck those people.
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Change of topic, but I just got a notification about a primary school friend. Female. Didn't have a thing for her, I just used to be pretty envious of her. She's being a bit of a prick, because she only ever contacts me when there's a primary school class reunion event thing. It's as if she's playing hard to get but as a friend. I would go talk to her, but half of me cannot be bothered, while the other half wants to keep this friendship just for the sake of it. This shit needs to end.
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